Operation Annoyance
by Midna Hytwilian
Summary: Zelda is fed up of hearing Ganondorf play the same song everyday on the organ and being held captive. Deciding it's time to fight back she starts operation annoyance. What went on while Link and Midna were saving the day and why Zelda was unconcious.


**Disclaimer: I own you, you own me, let's get together and hug Sweeney! Lol. I own nothing except myself. **

**A/N This was a random idea where I wondered what DID Zelda do while stuck with Ganondorf? So after a long talk a month ago with my BFF on how to torture Ganondorf I decided perhaps Zelda's just fed up. I love Midna and Link and Zelda but this is a comedy so I have to trash people.**

_Dear Diary, _I've been held captive by Ganondorf once more...Link is useless. I mean seriously it takes him forever to rescue me! And as for Midna...dear goddesses can she be anymore of a pain?

I mean all she ever does is make fun of me! Seriously she acts as if she's a princess...okay don't comment on that one. I mean tri-force of wisdom here, I'm smarter then I act.

Not only is being held captive bad but I also have to listen to Ganondorf play the organ all day long! WHY THOUGH? He doesn't even play things I like, he just keeps playing this dreary song that puts me to sleep!

So I've decided I'd have some fun. I have begun Operation Annoyance.

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"Hi Ganondorf, whatcha' up to?" Zelda asked walking up to him as he played the organ. He glanced up taken aback that she had come up to him. Never had she done that.

Still looking at her confused Ganondorf answered, "I'm...er...uh...playing the organ?" "Well it's my organ so play something I like." "What? You do realize I could kill you right?" "Yeah I do." "Then don't order me around, you're my prisoner!" "Nope you're MY prisoner." "I'm holding you captive." "I know you are but what am I?" "What that doesn't even make sense!"

Shrugging Zelda walked off whistling a little tune.  
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_Dear Fiendishly Evilish Monstrous Journal, _whoa long title. Anyway today my evil plans were going good like well always. I was doing the usual just playing the organ when suddenly Zelda comes up to me being a pain!

Honestly why did she even speak to me? She doesn't even come near me! In a sense I can't wait for Link to come so I can scare him off with my organ and if I do get defeated-again-then at least there won't be these akward Zelda annoying moments.

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Zelda sneaked behind Ganondorf and the organ making her breathing light. Suddenly she popped up screaming "LINK'S HERE!"

The lord of darkness screamed like a little girl at the sudden appearance and then turned around to the door to see Link was not there.

Glaring at the princess he shouted "what in Din's name was that for?" Shrugging like yesterday she drawled out "I donno know!"

Before he could lay his hands on her she walked off.

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_Dear Diary, _day 52, I've been trapped in here for 52 days and so far two of them have been the best. So far I've managed to make Ganondorf puzzled by my behavior and scream like a bulbin who just saw ice cream.

That indeed is an accomplisment.

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Humming the Mario Theme Zelda walks up to Ganondorf. "So are you looking foward to seeing Mario and Bowser next week?"

"Huh, I got into Brawl?" Ganondorf asks shocked that the princess would bring up the gathering of Nintendo worlds. "Yeah, Midna didn't though, Toon Link got her spot."

"That dork?" "Yeah I know right?" "Man Nintendo is desperate." "SO are you looking foward to them?" "I hate Mario." "Oh sorry I forgot." "You looking foward to Peach?" "Naw she's an idiot." "But you tend to hang out with her." "No she follows me." "Stalker."

Sighing and stretching Zelda sits in a chair nearby. "I did hear though that Sonic has a crush on you...actually he was going to propose."

And just like that she walked off leaving a very angry Ganondorf.

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_Dear Fiendishly Evilish Monstrous Journal, _how dare she bring up the fact that I'm gay!  
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No interuptions...odd. "Where is she?" Ganondorf muttered to himself as he played the organ. Not one sign of Zelda. Perhaps it was just P.M.S?

He spoke too soon. "One coconut, two coconuts, and you got Ganondorf and Zant!" She sang as she skipped her way into the room. "Hi Ganie! I was just singing about how you and Zant are nuts!"

"Ganie?" "Oh sorry I mean Granny, what with your hair and all." "Granny?!"

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_Dear Diary, _where are they?!

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Tired of the same song Zelda asks as she sits down on a nearby chair, "Ganondorf can you play something different?" "No." "Pwease?" "No." "I'll tell Link." "Huh?" "Apples." "Whatever." "Pwease pway a diffwent song!" "FINE just stop talking like that!" "Wahoo! Score five for Team Zelda!"

"What do you want to hear?" Ganondorf asks through gritted teeth. "First I want to hear Charge, then I want to hear the Sweeney Todd soundtrack by organ, then all the Twilight Princess songs-you know-, next I want London Bridge is Falling Down, and to end it all I want the Titanic Themesong."

"Are you forgetting who I am?" "Quiet you or I'll put those photos up on Ebay." "Not the ones where I'm making out with a puking Link who's trying to get away from me." "The very same."

Quickly he began playing the lists of songs. "Oh and one more thing." "What?" "I need you to say, 'I, Ganondorf here by state that I stink and Zelda is the very coolest and greatest of them all, therefore I give my spot up in Brawl to Midna.' Got it?"

His face began to reden and he roared annoyed. Ganondorf grabs her by the throat, tosses her up against the organ and knockes her unconcious, sighing he picks her body up and puts it in a holding spot where he ruined the statue.

She stands unconcious in the tri-force container. Going back to his organ he plays his dreary song once more. That same day Midna and Link arrived defeating him. Thus ends Operation Annoyance.

**A/N So much bashing, so little time. If you liked this one then you'll love my next oneshot I'm planning with my BFF about us being held hostage by Zant. Two insane authoresses being in the same room with one favorite nut job bad guy? Not. A. Good. Idea. **


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